Work brings pressures, no matter what your industry or your role, you will have tasks to complete within a certain time and if you are unable to complete those tasks, (for whatever reason) you start to feel pressured and stressed. Now when we are stressed, we seldom bring our best selves to work which may then cause us to act in a manner that can lead us into conflict with another person. It is also at this time, that the other characteristics of the people who we work with, for example, their sense of humor, political or sporting allegiances, their method of communication and problem-solving will suddenly start to matter to us and may even start to bother us. Notice how two unstressed colleagues will joke about football teams or discuss politics, as opposed to two colleagues, where one is having a bad day at work or in their personal life. Instead of taking a good-natured jibe at their football team’s performance, or even listening positively to a suggestion on how they should have approached a situation, they will do something the other person was not expecting. They will snap at them and not match their colleague’s communication. They may even decide that this is a great time for them to tell their work colleague what they really think of them and their constant attempts of humor or giving out advice. The other person not wishing to sit there and just take it will probably retaliate. Now they are in conflict. The most likely source of all work-based conflict comes when one or more people became stressed and are no longer able to either respond positively or communicate rationally with someone else. Most of the people who we work with, we would not see socially and may not always like them, but when we are in a good rational mood, can accept the differences and communicate well. It is when this quite thin filter is stripped away due to stress, that we decide that we can no longer put up with someone and decide to let them know.
Signs to watch out for
So, what is the best way to resolve conflict at work? not fall into it in the first place. When I was much younger like any young boy, I did not always treat work as seriously as I should have. I worked with a great young guy and we would always joke with each other and generally give each other a hard time. It helped the time pass in a mundane role and we both knew there was nothing nasty in it, just banter. Now the problem came one day when I failed to realise that he was having a rough time with his partner and was sitting alone and trying to figure a few things out. Failing to read the signals, (body language, self-isolation) I started one of our usual banter sessions. In no time at all, he shot out of his seat and was across the room and in my face. He snarled at me something about, not partaking of my usual rubbish and stormed off. I was about to respond by biting back when I spotted something, he had tears in his eyes. So, I sat along with my work colleagues in silence and let it pass. Later on, I went and found him and apologised for upsetting him. He explained what was happening and we talked about what was going on for him. Now if I had just retaliated at the initial moment and thought only about how his reaction had affected me, who knows how it could have escalated, he was really angry when he approached me and as he could not let his anger out where he wanted to, he displaced it and let it out on me.
We have to be really aware of other people’s feelings and emotions, as we never know just what is happening to them.
If you are currently involved in a work-based dispute and are looking to hire a professional mediator, then please contact me for a free consultation call.
Jason
Email me
Call: 07919102191
Website: Vantage Mediation
So, what is the best way to resolve conflict at work? not fall into it in the first place. When I was much younger like any young boy, I did not always treat work as seriously as I should have. I worked with a great young guy and we would always joke with each other and generally give each other a hard time. It helped the time pass in a mundane role and we both knew there was nothing nasty in it, just banter. Now the problem came one day when I failed to realise that he was having a rough time with his partner and was sitting alone and trying to figure a few things out. Failing to read the signals, (body language, self-isolation) I started one of our usual banter sessions. In no time at all, he shot out of his seat and was across the room and in my face. He snarled at me something about, not partaking of my usual rubbish and stormed off. I was about to respond by biting back when I spotted something, he had tears in his eyes. So, I sat along with my work colleagues in silence and let it pass. Later on, I went and found him and apologised for upsetting him. He explained what was happening and we talked about what was going on for him. Now if I had just retaliated at the initial moment and thought only about how his reaction had affected me, who knows how it could have escalated, he was really angry when he approached me and as he could not let his anger out where he wanted to, he displaced it and let it out on me.
We have to be really aware of other people’s feelings and emotions, as we never know just what is happening to them.
If you are currently involved in a work-based dispute and are looking to hire a professional mediator, then please contact me for a free consultation call.
Jason
Email me
Call: 07919102191
Website: Vantage Mediation
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